Between 1990 and 2015, divorce rates dropped sharply for people between 25 and 39. In the 40-49 age bracket, divorces increased, but not by very much. In the over-50 age range, divorce increased a whopping 109% during that same time frame. The divorce rate among couples over 65 increased even more. Why are so many older couples divorcing in the Chicago area, and what impact does it have on their families?
Attitudes have changed significantly among people over 55. In 2001, only 57% of people in this age group felt that marriage dissolution was morally acceptable; by 2015, that figure had risen to 71%. By comparison, divorce’s moral acceptability among people between 35 and 54 moved from 67% to 69% over that same period.
The Emotional Fallout of Grey Divorce in Chicago
Sociologists call the increase among older people “grey divorce.” A generation ago, many dissatisfied couples of this age usually remained legally married but lived separate lives. Sometimes, they even resided in separate households. Back then, people over 50 simply did not get divorced under almost any circumstances. This non-divorce option was popular for emotional reasons, in addition to social reasons. Grey divorce can be hard on adult children. Young children are much more resilient to emotional trauma like a divorce. Furthermore, a late-in-life divorce sometimes transforms weddings, graduations, and other events into intricate chess matches. Instead of focusing on the joy of the moment, adult children are obsessed with making sure that Mom does not have to sit anywhere near Dad’s new wife.
A Chicago divorce attorney is obviously not a psychologist or a matchmaker, but a lawyer can help families prepare for life after a grey divorce. That is especially important as lifespans become steadily longer.
Financial Implications of Older Divorce in Illinois
As bad as the emotional disruption can be, the financial disruption is usually much worse. Many people over 55 begin looking forward to a healthy and secure retirement. A grey divorce can completely upset the balance, especially if the husband and wife are already on their second marriage. Some potential concerns include:
- Health Insurance: A divorced spouse cannot receive group health benefits from the ex-spouse’s employer under any circumstances. This loss of coverage can be significant if the nonemployee spouse has pre-existing health conditions. COBRA coverage is prohibitively expensive for most people, and it is only a short-term solution anyway. The property division, as well as the award of spousal support, should take into account the new and expensive health insurance premiums in these cases.
- Retirement Plans and QDROs: By the time people reach this age, they often have large balances in their 401(k)s and other retirement accounts. Depending on the plan, the Qualified Domestic Relations Order which divides that account could take several approaches. Most non-employee spouses have a rollover option that is also tax free.
- Real Estate: Younger couples sometimes fight over who gets to keep the house. Older couples looking to downsize out of a home that needs work often fight over who must keep the house.
Most grey divorces settle out of court during formal or informal mediation. All these issues, and others, should be resolved in this process.
Contact Experienced Lawyers
Grey divorces involve unique issues. For a confidential consultation with an experienced family law attorney in Schaumburg, contact Glasgow & Olsson.
(image courtesy of Huy Phan)